Popular Hobo EVICTED from Upscale Gated Community Palace

 Living out here in the streets, its increasingly difficult to find a spot to throw my sleeping bag down and get a full night's sleep without having some security guard (or on occasion, SDPD)waking me up and telling me to move. Some hobos have bicycles and are, therefore, able to set up little campsites in the canyons on the outskirts of town, a few miles away from center city Hoboville where they "work"(panhandle). While they're able to live in peace with the coyotes, rattlesnakes and raccoons and shit/piss like cavemen/cave women and minimize the risk of their stuff being stolen when they leave it at their camp, I much prefer to live within close proximity to the amenities of a modern civilization. I
need a toilet, a water supply, electricity and ideally a free/unlocked wifi signal in order operate...oh yeah...I also need a little tiny piece of flat dry ground to sleep on.

A few weeks ago I moved back into a nice clean 'gated community' (actually its the concrete-walled, steel-gated dumpster pen behind CVS) where I've lived twice before over the past 2 1/2 yrs. Its a lavish upscale 16 x 20 ft. room with clean, like-new concrete floor and walls. The security lights high above on the rear wall provide a warm sunset-like ambient glow not unlike the mood lighting in the sunken living rooms of those million dolla castles up in Rancho Santa Fe. Its an open-air pavilion
(no ceiling) which (depending upon the weather/season) enables a rich and romantic cellustuous** mind-scape into the milky way galaxy when you're laying on your back in your sleeping bag gazing up into the night sky. During the day, especially in the summer, the room radiates like a hot sandy So. Cal. beach or a desert dune.

** I think I just made up that word, BTW. I sounds kinda naughty/sexy and it sounds quite sophisticated when you use it in casual conversation. I suppose it means heavenly, unearthly, dreamlike. But be careful, if you say it to the wrong person you may get your face slapped.)

The place is just sitting empty all year round as CVS prefers to keep their dumpster parked outside the steel gated pen near their rear exit door. This makes sense too as it allows employees to dispose of trash/discarded merchandise quickly and safely from the doorway of their stockroom. If they kept their dumpster in their designated gated pen, they'de have to carry their loads of trash down the 70 foot long concrete ramp walkway leading from their rear exit door to the parking lot and then carry
it another 90 or so feet back to their gated/secured dumpster.

You know this is the sort of room that fast seductions take place in.  Its got that unmistakable quality of peaceful ambiance and privacy which allows the mind to transport into a zone of unrestrained lustful fantasies. As a former disco DJ, I know a thing or two about seductions that happened so fast that the only thing left behind in the aftermath were sometimes a pair of high heels and a pair of pantyhose right there behind the cigarette machine where it all went down!

The best feature of all about this open air palace are its massive, solid, bridge steel constructed security gates.They're painted in a soft desert sand tan tone to match the interior salmon colored walls. These colors were once featured in the Feb.  2006 issue of Popular Home Design.

The first time I lived there, I had a lovely new king sized Serta Perfect Sleeper™mattress in there and I lasted for nearly a month before the guy whom I was sharing it with blew it up by laying up in there all day drunk playing his damn radio too loud.The security guard heard music and opened up the steel door and told him to get out. He dragged that mattress somewhere and used it himself. I returned a week or so later to the dumpster pen quietly with only my sleeping bag and shopping cart and I lived there for 3 more weeks before I was seen leaving the lovely gated community dwelling pushing my shopping cart and was told not to return. (Hobos just weren't meant to sleep in safe clean gated communities or anywhere else.)

Check out this place...here's a quick top-view drawing of it and below are three short video clips
I shot on Eviction Day #3...a day that will live in infamy.

Well since I began the Popular Hobo News and Entertainment blog, my need for a safe and secure storage area and a fashionable broadcast studio became mandatory. As I raided the FedEx dumpster and other nearby dumpsters to find sign building materials and furniture for the news room studio, I needed a place to store these valuable assets. That gated community has never been used to house dumpsters and that's why its been kept in such pristine condition. I credit the CVS store's management for such a prudent decision not to nasty-up this palace with their trash.  Most anyone who steps inside of this room can see instantly that this facility is destined to serve as a more noble and useful purpose than as a dumpster garage.

 As such, I moved into it again. I first began storing my Popular Hobo sign making materials, then I found a big box from which to construct my news desk, then I found a lovely chair etc. etc.
and before long I began sleeping there again. This time however, I secured those big heavy steel gates with my own Master lock to keep those pesky non-English speaking ( illegal aliens?!?!) housekeepers out of my newsroom. They're not bad people...they're just doing their yob!
These guys spend their long days pushing a trash can around the shopping center picking up tin cans to recycle and fetching dumpster treasures like any hobo but because they're doing official work for the property manager, they have a certain arrogance that is bad for us white skinned hobos.

One of them finally snitched on me and thus I was evicted again from the gated community.
I didn't argue or debate the issue; I simply packed up my shit and rolled out of there ASAP.
The supervisor  of the housekeeping crew warned that anything I leave behind will be thrown away.
He then phoned the corp. office for the security guard company and tried to invent a crime scene situation/urgency about it. THAT FUCKING PISSED ME OFF. I was in the middle of hand washing two new pairs of blue jeans and I had no room to take my wash bucket and wet clothes and so I moved them outside the gates and left a note on top of the shopping cart-- "PLEASE DO NOT TAKE OR  TOSS  MY STUFF INTO THE DUMPSTER...I'LL BE BACK SHORTLY, THANKS , SCOTT"

 I then called a taxi cab to come and pick me up to go to my storage place a few miles away to drop off a load of stuff from my shopping cart. Later,I walked 3 miles back to the shopping center where I left my new wet clean jeans and my bucket only to find that those fucking housekeepers had removed my shopping cart/blue jeans. I began a methodical search of every dumpster in the shopping center and after 20 minutes or so, not surprisingly, I found my bucket and jeans clean wet strewn across the bottom of a filthy dumpster. MY FUCKING HEAD IS GOING TO EXPLODE just thinking about this shit!!!!!!!!

As I said, these Mexicans are just following the rules and directions they've been told.

Perhaps its time for ICE to come out here to pay this crew and its supervisor a visit.
No, I'm not gonna snitch on anyone about their legal status--that would be cruel.
The solution to most all of my hobo woes is to just get the hell off the streets.

In the mean time, however, the search for a safe spot to sleep and keep our shopping
carts nearby is a never ending routine that goes on day by day. As for the storage 
of my Popular Hobo news room desk, chair, furniture etc and stacks of marketing supplies,
much of it is still sitting there inside the gated dumpster pen. My news desk was flattened down
and stacked with other cardboard for recycling. That's okay...it was too low and too shaky anyway.
My next news desk will be made of delrin, carbon fiber alloy or titanium and will be cemented into the concrete floor with 4 foot long teflon/titanium tenticles which anchor deep into the ground. It will take a 100 ton bulldozer, a crane and 40lbs of c-4 explosives to move my next news desk.

Here's some video clips I shot on eviction day...


  

  

 

American Cancer Society Relay For Life of Mira Mesa/Rancho Penasquitos

Last week at Mira Mesa Blvd. & Blk. Mt. Rd., I spotted a bunch of ladies carrying signs
and wearing purple logo t-shirtsv fanned out along the sidewalk and so I grabbed my camera
went across the street to investigate.

I met Carrol and she did this short video interview to explain what she and her friends were
promoting.

 

.

Relay For Life of Mira Mesa/Rancho Penasquitos
           Event Date: May 18, 2013 
Event Time: 9:00am
                                  Event Location: Hilltop Community Park

Please cut/paste this entire URL into your browser for directions and more info:

http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY13National?pg=informational&fr_id=48984&type=fr_informational&sid=128433


Sorry my HTMLwriting skills are rusty otherwise I'd have placed a link for you here.
 Of course this is a worthy cause--I'd bet that most all of you know of a friend or a relative whose life has
been impacted by cancer. Mine has. But this event, unlike those long walking events which 
take you from one town to another town as you walk with a few friends and meet a few more along the way, is a
2 day long event confined to the Hilltop Community Park. Seems that makes it much more intimate
and more manageable for the participants and everyone involved.

When Carrol mentioned that there will be music, tents, sleeping bags, and folks walking around in a circle
 for 2 days, she may not have considered that she was basically describing the environment in which
 we hobos live each and everyday out here in Hoboville. I'm just sayin'... :)
The only missing essentials are beer, cigarettes and shopping carts!
I may have other obligations that weekend but if  not,
don't be surprised if you see me there.
The other hobos,

 

New "Popular Hobo News Special Report" flasher...

As I mentioned a couple of weeks ago, I want to provide the citizenry of Mira Mesa a quick and 
useful signal and info. about actions and instructions for them to follow in the event that:

1) our friendly safe little town is invaded by a hostile entity,
2) is set on fire by rogue public teachers union officials who get pissed off when the voters decide NOT to hire certified convicted pedophiles as substitute teachers of elementary grade kids,
3)when some happy idiot decides to steal an F-18 from Mira Mar and fly it into BigLots during their big big annual mattress sale, or
4) when that skank rodent, Chris "HepB, HepC, HIV" White decides to ride his Black Harley    Chopper (beach cruiser bicycle) up the sidewalk to fry is skull on medical weed, yell obscenities
at cars and throw his beer cans everywhere like the piece of trash that he is.

The public needs one reliable news source to tune to and rely upon when these sorts of tragic terrorist events erupt without warning and I think I can do that job. My only dilemma is that stuff bad happens, its my instinct to roll up my sleeves and run into the center of the situation to help out
rather than sit back with my thumb up my ass and be a hapless hand-wringing spectator
like most folks.

I will eventually have an entire page long variety of these "Special Report" signal/flashers denoting the degrees of urgency and citizens' action that's necessary to take to be safe.

For example, if N. Korea, one day sends a suitcase nuke bomb to the B of A branch office here in MM, my "Special Report" flasher will be that of a colorful flashing mushroom cloud with a heartfelt message of best wishes and deepest sympathies for all (gulp...).

In the mean time whenver you see this photo of my pissed off face with red and blue roller-eyes and flashing lights in the background....

you know there's BAD stuff going down out here in Hoboville and that I'm either covering it or I'm involved in it! Either way, you'll know that I know stuff that you need to know about immediately.
Got that...? Good because I'm getting confused myself.

Just know this: Now you know that I know when and what you need to know when there's a need to know the stuff that I know when I know it and you'll know it when you see this flasher thingy flashing.

Hobo Love Affairs, Romances, Friendships w/ Benefits and Drinking Buddies...

Disclaimer: The following discussion is a timely one out here in Hoboville, which will, by the carefully selected citation and analysis of actual local hobos' current and former so called relationships with other hobos of the opposite sex, attempt to clarify and dismantle many of the long held assumptions and myths surrounding the propensities of hobo behaviors, psychiatric health and their capacities for human interaction. I make no apologies nor will I held liable for any despair, sadness, hostility, nor ridicule and rumors which may propagate as a result of my exquisite and highly detailed examinations of the subjects noted and named herein.
 
There are lots of generalizations and stereotypical assumptions that most people make about hobos/homeless people and when we examine their relationships,


Case Study: Popular Hobo Research Science PHRS #16548-UTR.1287.23A, rev. 4
Let us begin today's lecture by exposing and digesting one particular alleged coupling of one Mr. David Mick and his occasional beer guzzling buddy named Jon Jon. Mr. Mick confessed to me one day after he had taken of adult beverages, a scene which played out on the public city sidewalk of Mira Mesa Blvd and Black Mt Road one afternoon! Mr. Jon Jon had allegedly invited Mr. Mick to adjourne from the busy noisy sidewalk and come with him back to his quiet warm home a few blocks away promising him a chance to take a badly needed shower. This, btw, is a very common ploy of sexual seduction known by most every hobo everywhere and one which Mr. Mick was seriously contemplating. "Something about the way he was smiling at me told me that he had plans other than just letting me take a shower.and it  gave me the creeps and so I told him that will pass on his invitation." Mick said.

He continued the story. "Feeling like I'd just broke his heart or something, Jon Jon stomped off across the street feeling rejected. Then he turned back around and while cars were all sitting there with their windows rolled down, and he just exploded with a passionate outburst: "YOU DON'T LOVE ME !!!!!!!!! YOU NEVER LOVED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I was stunned. I didn't know whether to run and hide or to run over and kick his drunken ass while everyone around heard him yelling. I looked down at one guy in his car who was listening to this  and I told the guy, "Ya know that's the smartest thing he's said all day long!"

Case Study: Popular Hobo Research Science PHRS #1BST3646-65.dc24, rev.2

Ahhh Haaaa!! The Popular Hobo Really IS A Cop!"

It seems that for the entire time I've been homeless, most or all of the other Mira Mesa hobos have,
wondered, worried, proffered, speculated, contemplated, debated and, yes, at last, made the determination that I'm an undercover SDPD officer! The evidence they cite is most compelling:
they saw me talking to an on duty cop, they saw me riding in the backseat of a black and white
SDPD cop car, or they heard two cops mention my name. The fact that I'm the most arrested (and
perhaps the most watched/scrutinized) hobo in town, is apparently more validation that I'm a cop than to the contrary according to these paranoid hobos. Whenever they saw me getting arrested, one of them claimed that my arrests were most likely staged/theatrical acts designed to trick them all into   believing that I was a real "criminal" just like some of them are!

The very first time one of them told me this rumor, my reaction was to deny it, naturally. However, weeks later when I heard it again from two other hobos, I realized that these hobos must have conducted a thorough and rigorous, scientific investigation on me in order to dismiss my denial
out of hand.

The rumor/myth that I'm working undercover as a cop, to me, is hilarious. And because I do enjoy a good laugh at the expense of others sometimes, I only denied that rumor the first time I heard it. But since then and to this day, I do not deny any crazy rumors or myths that these insane hobos conjure up. Its been over fours years now and that myth/rumor  is more real and more alive than ever and it keeps me amused.

And now for the very first time, I feel its appropriate that I share something else about my alleged long standing career with SDPD. I think I was "promoted" this morning @ Jack in the Box! Check out this short video of myself and SDPD Sergeant Jack Didelot.

Pssssst...please don't blow my "cover" if you happen to see me on the streets. Like don't call me Officer Hobo  or Deputy Scott Hobo or some other such title. Otherwise, call me anything, anytime... just call me. ;)

Hobo Diatribe FInds Useful Purpose (As Infantile Humor)

I'm so sick and tired of hearing the latest death threats and obscene vulgarities uttered by the flapping gums of Chris White's yapper and it seems like every other day he's tagged more street signs and more utility boxes along Mira Mesa Blvd. with his big Sharpie markers with crazy violent/obscene vulgar about me. The only reason he gets mentioned at all on my blog is because he's the proverbial village idiot whom is bound and determined to do some really, really, really sTuPiD, stupid stuff!

I just hope I've got my camera handy when he does.In the mean time I need to upload this little video I created featuring Chris White's toothless yapper. The words are Chris White's- the puppet and
voice are my own creation.

Wow, that sounds more like Chris than Chris sounds like Chris! I can't even watch this video any more because I did the most authentic Chris White voice that  it makes my vomit whenever I hear his yapper yapping

An Internationally Known and Locally Respected Fotographer

Last summer/fall while I was on the waiting list to get into St.Vinny's to partake of their so called RESIDENTIAL REHAB PROGRAM**  (remember,I'm court ordered to go into residential rehab),I was living downtown at the world famous Baltic Inn. Perhaps you've driven by it and took some pics from the outside or maybe you heard that one of your fav hiphop/gangsta-rap celebrity idols was staying there. Well, I was there too. They let me stay there because I'm the Popular Hobo.

One night I was walking around downtown and  I saw a young guy shooting photos.He looked like a tourist to me (I'm not sure why since I myself do the same thing and I damn sure ain't no tourist.) and so I walked over to him and started talking to him about photography. His name is Mike and he's from Germany and yes he was a "tourist" staying downtown for a few days and heavy into his photography. I gave him some tips on places to go to snap some classic postcard-quality photos of San Diego's downtown scenes etc. We exchanged contact info and then went our separate ways.

You know how that goes when you meet some nice friendly person from out of town (overseas) whom you share a common interest with but then later, due to the daily grind of your job/school/life's bullshit etc. etc., you just never seem to find the time to maintain a long distance friendship.

Well, I'm not too busy to spend some of my quality hobo time with anyone whom loves photography as much as my friend Mike from Germany does. We swapped email a few times and he sent me some of his stuff he shot while he was here in San Diego. He's an avid student of the craft and an amateur who would like to make money with his artwork.The shots he sent to me were absolutely stunning. While I enjoy shooting San Diego's downtown scenes from an architectural perspective, Mike shot the pedestrians/people…emotions…their very thoughts it seems …the beauty as well as the anguish…and also the raw heart wrenching despair of those filthy downtown hobos. He stopped some of the most amazing expressions/emotions and situations that you always see while you walk around in any city which occur in the blink of an eye. Expressions that cannot be posed nor replicated by models. Surreal artwork…true urban scenic art that is, IMO, gallery quality.

Apparently there's a lot of politics within the print publishing industry in Germany and Mike tells me that his stuff would be rejected out of hand simply because he doesn't have a college degree or some other prerequisite certification to be qualified to have the talent to shoot such compelling quality artwork as he has demonstrated to me. (I thought their socialist system has free market capitalism built into it...I dunno.)


Anyway, if you enjoy urban scenic photo-artwork then take a look at Mikes stuff on flickr.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/metal_mike/
 
Be friendly, say 'Hi' and tell him that Scott sent ya! ; )



 **I waited for 8 weeks to get into Vinny's only to discover that they LIED through their teeth about having a real rehab program.Of course all that they told me verball;y was not in writing.