Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Upgrading With Lights and Sirens...

Once I get the POPULAR HOBO NEWS & ENTERTAINMENT blog's web page looking right
with built in looping gif. and audio effects of emergency alert signals, I'll go ahead and register with the FCC as an OFFICIAL NEWS BROADCAST STATION.

That way, whenever we have some sort of major county-wide catastrophe such as a 2 mile diameter sized asteroid on target to crash into Mission Bay, an attack by Al Quada, a new Swine Flu epidemic, a new busload of downtown-pesky-and-hostile, heroin-addicted hobos invading Mira Mesa to panhandle, or a big ole' mid-western sized thunderstorm with 15 tornados, grapefruit-sized hail stones, rainfall so intense you need a scuba tank just to walk outside or god forbid, another manic psychotic meltdown episode from Chris White (which, unless he finds a new dope dealer very soon, is highly probable within the next 30 days), the local citizenry can just visit my blog and they'll have all the latest NEWS REPORTS presented to them with little police sirens flashing and easy to follow instructions on where to hide  and what to bring with you to be safe!!

See that video loop...Today I slapped together this little POPULAR HOBO SPECIAL REPORT video animation to test out. This is a test of THE EMERGENCY BROADCAST SYSTEM...This is only a test. If this were an actual emergency, you would know it because all the television and radio news reporters would be
messing their diapers and most of these local police/rescue personnel would be tied up in traffic on Mira Mesa Blvd. somewhere. You would be on your own to try and figure out WTF to do!!

Just a few weeks ago when the city decided to tear up the intersection at Mira Mesa Blvd.& Blck Mt. Rd. to install new wheelchair ramps (there were ramps installed there 10 yrs ago btw), the entire town of Mira Mesa became an extremely risky place to be! Anarchy was looming...civil unrest was boiling... public safety health and safety was fleeting...Mira Mesa was ripe for a revolutionary war to errupt right there at the Am/Pm on Saturday morning. Why? Because society was unprepared /unwarned about the construction work and were not ready to be stuck in traffic gridlock in the area for the extra 20 or ao minutes required to move down the Blvd.  Local gov. officials fucked up by not
preceding the work with at least two full weeks of marketing/display ads and huge road signs notifying folks of the project and effected days.  Its typically city or state gobment that precipitates
and facilitates anarchy and public outrage. Civil war could have popped off!

I have a lady friend of mine who's married with a family and a good professional city gobment job downtown. She works 6 days/wk. and she was intending to meet me at Starbucks early Sat. morning on her way to work. She arrived very late and when she drove up to me in her car, she was screaming and cussing like I've never heard her before to someone on the phone about the traffic jam on Mira Mesa Blvd. She was talking to the SDPD  Dispatcher. I heard her say "If you don't get some cops out here to direct traffic, there's gonna be people getting shot and run over out here...there 's going to be a fucking riot out here soon!!" Later that day I saw three incidents of road rage and one had spilled  all the way into the liquor store.

There was a situation that I could have helped to alleviate in several ways. If I had been properly notifed by the SDPD or the City Traffic Dept. of the project I could have not only posted a few news reports about it, but i could have organized a HOBO SAFETY PATROL/ TRAFFIC SIGNAL TASK FORCE UNIT. As the Chief Unit Commander, I'd have  recruited 5 or 6 of the finest  local hobos around. We'd  first raid the Fed Ex Office store's dumpster to get lots of sign making materials and make  a bunch of "STOP" and "GO" signs. I'd assign hobos to each intersection to direct traffic all day....of course to get a hobo to do anything all day long, you gotta have a steady supply of beer and cigarettes on hand. Because old David Mick is blind in one eye and can't see too well out of his good eye, I'd probably assign him to operate the Task Force Unit Beer/Cigarette Command Center at the
crows nest where we like to drink beer. Btw, I've already got a police traffic whistle I found in the dumpster plus a couple day-glo colored shirts made for working in precisely these dangerous situations.
You see, one thing about hobos, especially myself-- when danger happens and panic strickens those closest to the situation, they(we) don't run away to seek sanctuary from it. Generally speaking, most hobos actually enjoy anarchy, danger and public panic because to them its entertaining to see folks with lots of valuable stuff, new stuff and stuff to make their lives more comfy, suddenly realize that their stuff is useless to them when shit's running amuck.I suppose many hobos feel that way out of envy and that's sick. I don't find dangerous events,tragedy  or even traffic jams to be entertaining myself but rather for me its a chance to do some work for a change.

Anyway, I'm gonna dig up some sound effects... ocean liner fog horn, tornado siren, ambulance siren,
air raid siren, woman screaming and build a bunch more flashing police car lights and other animated stuff and build some animated banners to use in my blog. Don't worry, I'm not gonna turn this place into disco light show or carnival. I don't wanna overload your senses nor give the impression of s circus party. No, this blog is a serious investigative jouralist's MULTIMEDIA NEWS  CENTER.


No comments:

Post a Comment