Wednesday, March 20, 2013

My Welcome into Hoboville Nov.4, 2008...

Whether you're living in your car behind the AM/PM or sleeping in a dumpster pen beside the grocery store, you're under constant scrutiny by everyone whether you know it or not but most folks don't see nor care to know particular distinctions between hobos unless they know one or two really well. Most folks choose to ignor you and give the impression that they never saw you, while other folks (such as the SDPD) make it their official bid-nis to get their nose into your bid-nis so they'll know what's up and who and where in the event that there's some report about some hobo-related stuff going down. When you're living outside, you might be interested to know, your 4th Amendment rights protecting you from unreasonable search/seizures pretty much vanish and it becomes quite  routine for you to be stopped/searched etc. once a week or four times in one day for no reason other than that you happened to be there when a cop drove past and saw you.

 The first cops I met the very first night became homeless were SDPD Officers Cody and Tyler. I was sound asleep in my car at the Park and Ride behind Best Buys. I guess they knew I was homeless by the heaping stack of crap I had in my backseat. They checked out my license and asked me why I'm sleeping in my car and so I told them my story of how I'd just lost my house in foreclosure etc etc.

Cody and Tyler were sorta like the un-Official Welcoming Committee to Hoboville/Mira Mesa, at least that's the impression I got because as soon as I told them it was my first night in my car, they both started giving me some useful advice. I remember that like it was last week and looking back,
I think that SDPD needs to create a new position/job ( Hoboville Welcoming Host)  and they need to produce a nice sturdy 11"x 14" fold-out style, 4-color, photo-filled glossy brochure/guidebook with area maps and stuff.  It needs to have a catchy and friendly title...

                             "Welcome To Hoboville...
                                               We're The SDPD and We're Here 
                                       To Protect and Service You During Your Stay!"

Come to think of it, while Cody and Tyler are nice cops, they're also serious cops. I believe there's another cop I've met who would perhaps be more suited for this new job as SDPD's Hoboville Welcoming Host. He's recently retired as I understand and so he's probably bored and would like to serve his community again. As I recall from being arrested by him at least three times its his charm, his warmth and his compassion for those filthy drunken hobos nad criminals of every sort and most of all its that New York accent of his that all combine to make retired Officer Steve Wright the perfect  Welcoming Host. Not gonna hold my breath for that to happen. ;p

Officer Cody is getting herself a few "fan pics" of the POPULAR HOBO before I
 become a huge celebrity...she's probably gonna sell em on Ebay.


I like when Officer Cody stops by to say hello, but we really need more 'quality time' together 
without rollers, cop radios and all the other cop buzz going on that distracts
 her from my radiant charming/whatnot. 

This is the first of a multi-part series as I discuss those first few days and weeks living on the streets in Mira Mesa.
My, my how time flies when you're living this hobo lifestyle.

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